


Proposal Between Two Unconventional Lovers

by Yku



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:02:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26309017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yku/pseuds/Yku
Summary: Hisoka traced a circle around the base of Illumi's ring finger, "I'm here to make a proposal Illumi... A real one."
Relationships: Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck
Comments: 4
Kudos: 168





	Proposal Between Two Unconventional Lovers

**Author's Note:**

> So I wrote this fic because Illumi said that engagement ring/prenuptial agreement thing to Chrollo and co. aboard the Black Whale. It's either a really weird metaphor, or they are actually married. I took it as the latter, because you know... reasons. Anyways, enjoy.

Illumi took a sip from his cherry flavored bubble tea in the corner of the café, away from the rest of the customers. It was Milluki's favorite place. Of course, the shut-in assassin would never go out to the café personally, instead opting to make their butlers go out and buy a drink for him. The drinks were all brightly colored, and immensely sweet. Illumi grimaced internally, although his face remained as expressionless as ever. 

_"Sweet. Just like Kil's aura."_

_"Kil..."_

Thinking about his little brother made Illumi uncharacteristically angry. His anger spiked whenever he thought about how his cute little brother just slipped away from his grasp. He ran away with that _thing._ Before he knew it, he let his aura get out of control. A few people nearby collapsed. His nails elongated and veins started to protrude from his fingers as he thought about what he would do when he caught Kil-

He got distracted by an approaching aura. It, without a doubt, belonged to a very proficient Nen user. A Nen user Illumi was very familiar with. Illumi debated whether or not he should just dip, but before he could make a decision the owner of the aura was already beside his table. 

"Illumi~" 

"Hisoka."

The murderer was probably here to annoy him again. Annoy him with his annoyingly silky voice. Usually, Hisoka's presence was welcome company to distract Illumi from his boredom. It's not like he had any friends. However, he was pretty sure Hisoka helped Killua when they were chasing Alluka as that creep had a weird obsession with Gon. 

Hisoka grabbed Illumi's hand, and caressed it gently, sending a shiver down Illumi's spine. A shiver of disgust, and a shiver of want.

"You always look so stone-faced, Illumi, but I can tell you're boiling with rage inside~" Hisoka let out a little moan and licked his lips slowly, "It's so entertaining to try and discern your emotions. You always keep them so bottled up... Except when it comes to Ki-"

"What happened to your hand?" Illumi cut off Hisoka, unwilling to continue that line of discussion. 

Although it looked and worked like a regular hand, it definitely did not feel like flesh. Instead, it felt like the rubbery texture he's felt a million times before, whether in one of their scuffles or... a more sensual type of fight. Hisoka's hand was entirely made out of Bungee Gum. 

"Ah... I had a little... Incident. With the Spiders"

Hisoka traced a circle around the base of Illumi's ring finger, "I'm here to make a proposal Illumi... A real one."

Illumi cocked his head, intrigued. It wasn't the first time the clown had hired him for some reason or the other. His curiosity made his wrath fade, as he wondered what Hisoka had in store for him this time.

"A contract about us- A contract between us..." He purred sensually, his eyes narrowed into slits, as he pressed his lips against the assassin's pale hand, "I'll pay you of course."

"Your aura... Ooohhhhh..." He moaned, breathing in Illumi's scent deeply, "So nice~"

Hisoka spun a little Bungee Gum around Illumi's ring finger. The Bungee Gum tightened, turning the Zoldyck's pale skin red. Illumi observed the finger silently, but didn't make any effort to get out of his predicament. He wondered if Hisoka would snap his finger in half. He wouldn't put it beyond the psychopath.

Leaning his face into the other's, Hisoka grinned, "Let's get married, Illumi~". He looked like a deranged clown from a horror movie. If it was anyone else, they surely would have fainted. Of course, Illumi wasn't just anyone, he was a top class assassin, trained from birth to suppress his emotions. Even so, Illumi felt his heart skip a beat when Hisoka laid out his heartfelt confession. 

"Our honeymoon," Hisoka was so close Illumi could feel his warm breath. It smelled like Bungee Gum, that brand of gum that Hisoka always chewed. The Nen around his finger was impossibly tight now, cutting off all circulation. It would be a pain if he lost one of his fingers. Still, there was something so erotic, maybe even _romantic,_ about this situation, that he couldn't bring himself to voice his concerns. "Will be on a cruise." 

Closing the last bit of distance between the two, Hisoka leaned for a short kissed. "The Black Whale, to be precise. I'll hire you to join the Spiders and try to kill me~" This time, Illumi was the one to initiate the kiss. The shock made Hisoka finally release the finger that was still firmly confined by his Hatsu. The kiss was violent, the two biting at each other's lips and tongue until their mouths were covered in red. 

"For what could be more romantic than two lovers attempting to kill each other?" 

Illumi didn't care much for Hisoka's sick fetishes, but as he was a professional assassin, he would take on any request provided the compensation was fitting enough. Licking his busted lip, he thought he would miss their intimate nights together after Hisoka was killed. But such was life. It's not good to get too attached to people that were not family. 

"Of course, I know you're a pragmatic man. We'll have to sign a prenup." Hisoka traced the rim of Illumi's pants teasingly, sometimes allowing his finger to delve slightly beneath the fabric, "I'll make sure that you'll be paid even if I die." 

Several fingers flitted across Illumi's crotch lightly and gently, sending a jolt down his spine, "Not that that would happen of course, but I know you're finicky like that. So formal, even though we're so close~" Hisoka feigned hurt, pouting, "So how about it? Is it enough to entice you?" 

"Yes" Illumi said, a playful smile on his lips, "It is a satisfactory contract. How about 1 billion Jenny? It's a discount just for you."

Hisoka shrugged, "Sure. See you at our honeymoon then, dear husband~" 

With a coy smile and a wink, Hisoka sauntered off to do God knows what atrocities. Illumi rubs his ring finger, still numb. He'll probably need to bury himself underground for a few hours again, just to cool off. 


End file.
